There are few ways to really totally turn me off from eating something I otherwise love: pizza. I don’t eat my pizza with cheese on top, in fact the only time I ever consumed pizza with cheese is at Spumoni Gardens where the cheese is hidden underneath the sauce, thus playing my own kind of mind game.
But if you want a surefire way to suppress your appetite for something you love try this:
Go over a friend’s house and have her husband make you what is ostensibly delicious homemade pizza that you can easily pick the cheese off of yourself. Then have him sit down and continuously play with his long, gross, filthy looking beard all through the meal. Pulling, tugging, twirling… He’s like a Valley Girl with a pigtail and think about how those hands that won’t get away from said filthy looking beard were just kneading the dough of the pizza you’re supposed to eat. Then have someone yell out, “Oh! I found a beard hair!”
Ta da. You’re no longer hungry. At all.
Any other appetite suppressants?