Suddenly, it’s freaking freezing out and I can’t even deal with it. How the hell did I live in Minnesota for two winters? How do people live in Canada? No, seriously, how?!
The sidewalks in DC are a mixed bag, mostly because it rained, then snowed. This pattern of weather prompted the rain to freeze as a sheet of ice underneath the snow and then there are people who are all, “Whatevs, I’m not going to bother shoveling or salting my sidewalk.” So there are patches of slippery, dangerous ice lurking many, many places. I’m already trying to figure out if I can legit sue GW if I slip there because not only do they not shovel or salt their sidewalks but their construction people leave pieces of wood with rusted nails out where you can fall on them and die.
Then I see people out for runs on these same sidewalks and I’m thinking, “yeah, you’re real smart. You’re such a badass. I really hope the cast they put you in when you slip and fall on this shit looks awesome.”
Maybe I’m just not committed to running as much as everyone else, or I’ve just lucked out with mild winters that never left much in the way of dangerous running conditions aside from chilly temperatures, but I see these kinds of things as one of those “I could’ve foreseen that terrible event happening” moments. I know lots of people pride themselves on running through any kind of weather, for weeks or years on end without taking a day off, running on holidays, blah blah blah. You know, those people who always post somewhere, “DID YOU GET YOUR RUN IN BECAUSE I GOT MINE IN EVEN THOUGH IT’S A BLIZZARD OUTSIDE!!!!!!!!!!!! GO ME!!!!!!”
But let me assure all of you: I will never be one of those people. You can come here, secure in the knowledge that my achievements set the bar so low it’d be impossible to limbo underneath it.