So I’m normally a pretty fast runner. I mean, my half marathon times are like below 1:40. And I don’t even really train, so actually I’m probably a lot faster than that. But I did a bunch of races over the course of a weekend and then I got THE FLU and I was forced to do a race from the back of the pack and it was pretty fun because I did it with friends and we basically goofed off the entire time.
I’m going to tell you guys about something you may have never known about in a race: there are like, slow people back there. I’m serious. THERE ARE PEOPLE BEHIND US and I just found out, when I became one of them, that they don’t get the same race I do. Apparently, when we go around saying how a 6 minute mile is the same as a 16 minute mile, we don’t actually act on that. I know, shocking right? Turns out, some runners are more equal than others.
Should I stop the sarcasm? Maybe? Yeah. I get why people are making a big deal about a blog post by a fast runner who suddenly found herself at the back of the pack due to injury/illness but honestly, I can’t help but give the whole thing the stink eye. Are fast people morons? Do they just never speak to the people they completely ignore and run off on? Do they really not know that there are people behind them in races that they don’t even know a slow runner or a walker who hasn’t mentioned, “oh yeah, at my half marathon this weekend THEY RAN OUT OF WATER”?
Am I the only one looking at this and thinking, wtf, you didn’t know this happened? One fast person acts all outraged and suddenly we’re having a discussion about how Runner’s World put on a race that was kinda crappy but the norm for the people at the back of the pack? But for some reason she can’t blame Runner’s World for that because it’s their race that they marketed the shit out of it but… they’re not responsible for making sure the course stays closed to traffic for the entire 3 hours and 30 minutes they told people they’d have to finish? But it’s still 100% REALLY well executed and I’d recommend it to anyone including the people who paid all this money and kinda got screwed, you guys should still totally pay for it and run it again, k?
I feel like I’m listening to white people say racism isn’t a thing anymore or how women are treated equally in the workplace after my boss says really loudly how my male co-workers need to think about their careers and professional advancement and I’m just ignored and/or asked when I’m getting married. Fuck I’m in a bad mood this week.