I try not to be hostile

Twitter is amazing.

I have lots of fun conversations with people on twitter.

But if you piss me off, shit’s going to get hostile real fast. LIKE REAL FAST. And the best part is that basically everyone can see your complaint so while no one ever responds to an email, on twitter they get back to you in two seconds. And JetBlue, JetBlue gives great tweets. I mean great, and this only endears them even more to me.

But food trucks are pissing me off, people. Okay. You can’t show up in my neighborhood, promise to be there every Monday in August when it’s prime Italian Ice season, get me hooked on your damn product, and then fucking refuse to show up anymore BECAUSE YOU HAVE PRIVATE PARTIES SO YOU DON’T NEED MY ICE MONEY ANYMORE.

I was looking forward to that Monday ice ritual like you have no idea and I am one loyal customer. Not a week goes by that I don’t visit Captain Cookie for my weekly cookie and ice cream lunch. I went out in the POURING RAIN for my pina colada ice cream and maple bacon cookies. Frequent buyer cards are what I live for, and I was all set to spend every Monday camped out in front of that damn ice truck.

SO NOW THEY’RE ALL, “WE’RE NOT COMING ANYMORE UNLESS WE DON’T HAVE SOMETHING BETTER TO DO” AND I’M IRRATIONALLY UPSET ABOUT IT. I’m hurt, I’m angry, I just want my damn ice that I was really looking forward to. Listen, I’ll follow you guys around DC, I don’t have a problem with that and if your actual store weren’t 3 hours away and nowhere near a metro stop/public transportation, I would be there religiously because ice is just my thing, I love it, and it’s hard to find a good one.

But now you’ve pissed me off, Carmen’s Italian Ices of Rockville, Maryland. And I shall take my wrath to twitter so you know just how badly I really want a fucking ice and some god damn custard.

Yes, I’m probably insane but that’s just because you don’t understand how amazingly delicious their pina colada ice was.

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